asl: 20, f, sg
profile: i'm cute & my favorite person in the world, JeremyChee♡ +
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Sad souls

Evening earthlings. This is hell of a lonely night i'm going through. Boy's gone to field camp.. And i'm all alone. Oh well. I'm kinda pissed. I don't get it. Why? Why can you reply others bt not me? Why? Am i that boring? Do you hate me? Why are you ding this to me? I remember i told myself not to fall s deep. Know when to let go.. But i guess i've dropped in.. Way too fast. I need someone. Someone to pull me out. I don't want to be with you anymore. Cos everytime you make me feel like i'm on cloud 9 then youdrop me to hell. Why? why do you like to torture me so badly? Explain to me. Answer me.. No point. I'm just here talking to myself. Cos you will never appear here. You will never have any reason to open up our blog. Not even a single reason. Even i cant find any reason that you would waste your time to even read this. Ha. Someone. Please save me.. Tell me what should i do. Tell my heart to give up on such a guy like you. Break those strings that took me 2 years to bond with yours. Anything.. Anything will do. Just tell me what should i do. I really don't wanna feel like crap over here in front of my comp and youre there sleeping. I know i'm suppose to be understanding and not qurrel or fuse about things like this.. but i can't help it. I miss you so dearly. But do you? Do you even miss me at all? those words that you said made me feel like you're saying all this is just to pacify me.. Tell me why? I need answers. Where did the man that use to love me so deeply went? Where? Did i chase him away? Did i do something wrong? Tell me.. I'll change it. I'll not do it again.. I admit sometimes when i'm angry i always do crazy things like start a quarrel with you. But please understand that im like this.. Im changing slowly. But please tae your time to understand me as well. Im standing here still trying my est to understand you.. But i guess you're not even trying at all. To you, as long as we're not quarreling everything's fine. There's not a need to change. Sigh. I think i must be mad.. Sorry for spamming all these nonsense. guess it ought to be erased. I apologize. P.s - If you ever see this, please tell me the truth and be honest with me. Tell me if you still love me. If you don't please let me go. I know you dont wanna be the bad guy but hint me so i'll be the bad guy in this rs. So that i can give myself another chance to recover from all these sadness and love myself even more. Or maybe perhaps hoping someone who would treat me better. Or maybe you could even find someone who's so much better than me. :') But remember, the love we had before were real. No doubt about it.

Honestly,

I just found out that we could never be the same in the past.. We've just got too use to being with one another that, no matter how harsh the word are we always think that it wouldn't hurt the other party. Now I know.. I think we can never last forever, we can't stay together. We wouldn't grow old and start a family together. Because we're just so different. People say, sometimes it's the differences that brought both parties together. But mine... It's all about tolerance. Giving way. Pleasing you. It was never about me. It has always been all about you. I'm very sure you don't treat me like your Girlf. I'm just some girl that you want to spend your time with so that you wouldn't feel lonely. I'm not the one. & I guess you might not be my one too. Wonder how much longer can this go on.. 

Just imagine.

Afternoon earthlings!
 I'm back for today! :) back to.. Type something that's been going on in my mind for quite some time. Have you guys ever wonder.. The person you're with now might actually ended up with someone else in the end? The person now, which you've tried to tolerate. Tried to change for, tried to understand & please, is actually just some one. Some one who's actually a passerby that happens to enter into your life and steps out afterwards? I don't know about that. I'm just wondering though.. People always say, "what's meant to be yours, will be. & what's not, will not." & i believed in that. Why? Very simple. Because the one that stays after so so so so soooo long and stays forever is yours. And the one who stays. Stays cos you've been together for so long and doesn't wanna leave, will leave. He/She doesn't belong to you. They're just passerby's. no matter how much you try to control for them to not talk, not to meet, not to say anything about them.. in the end, they just might end up together. sad, but true.. It's like.. No one can stop this. No one has the ability to stop someone talking to another person for so long. Just imagine, if they've got the fate to be together. No matter what you do. Is useless. Cos in the end, they'll end up together. & you (me) is just a passerby. :') 

Just a thought though. Who knows? Maybe a few years later, I might come back to this post and laugh to myself saying, "I knew it" 😁




No rights.. At all.

I know I've got no rights to tell you not to smoke, cos I smoke.. But I just want you to know that I'm worried. I just don't want you to become some heavy smoker where every part of you reeks of nicotine. Hate it.. I mean, I use to be okay with it. Till now. I don't know why but, I just don't like it when you smoke so much. I know you promised me you wouldn't, but.. I don't know. Maybe I still can't bring myself to trust someone that much. Because I've learnt that, trusting some one this much, could bring you alot of pain and disappointments.
'sweet hearbeats' by lithium with image from weheartit.